Happy Birthday

I decided to hijack my wife's blog today. The last thing she posted was the announcement of our two little twins, Evangeline Olivia and John Craig. Since then much has happened, and I didn't want the first thing she saw upon revisiting her blog to be the reminder of the happy news. The knife went straight into my heart as I looked at her last post. You see, our beautiful babies have gone to be with Jesus.
This is without a question the hardest thing I've had to write. We knew them as well as any parent. We loved them as we held them in our arms. They were perfect. How wonderful to have had the moments we did. Nevertheless, it is difficult to go on with two little holes in each of our hearts. We have three children, and though I know Jillian doesn't use our first born's name (she goes instead by the name wiggles), our little ones are now in the safe arms of our Savior thereby not needing the disguise of a nickname to keep them protected.
Evangeline and John were fully used by the Lord. His purpose for their lives, all be it short, was realized for the hour they spent with us on this earth. His grace shown in each breath they took, and the sweetness of Christ in their tiny faces as they rested without fear or worry on mommy's tummy.
We are forever changed having known them. What a good mommy she was to them as she held them. The caring and comforting voice of one so sweet and so filled with the faith of the Lord. It was a shock to learn that they would come just a little too early, and there was not much time to prepare for that day our world ended. But even through the valley of the shadow of death, she did not fear evil, but drew close to the Lord's promise that we will one day see them again, soon.
I love and admire the mommy of our three little babies. She has taught me to love so deep and so strong. I will love Wiggles, Evangeline and John forever; and I will love their mommy, if possible, even longer.

Evangeline Olivia

and 

John Craig

Born Sept. 16th 2013

Happy three week birthday my little babies.

Big Blessing, Little, Scary Package

I'm posting for the first time in a long time. It's been a little nuts here, and here is a very simple way to explain about 1/2 of it:

See that? This is not just a pregnancy announcement. Thats two, count 'em, two children in there! We are joining the multiples club. Here we go!

Jillian

PS Any multiples moms with some sage wisdom, share here please! We're a tad overwhelmed... and outnumbered...

Mother's (and Grandma's) day

When I was little this poem hung on my wall. It was a gift from my grandmother. Sitting on this side of childhood, it makes me teary and miss my grandma with a powerful ache. Today I give it back to the next generation of grandmothers, who have raised their children and are helping their children to raise children. Happy Mother's Day Oma and Grandma!

I Like To Walk With Grandma

I like to walk with grandma,

Her steps are short like mine.

She doesn't say "Now hurry up!"

She always takes her time.

I like to walk with Grandma,

Her eyes see things mine do...

Wee pebbles bright,

A funny cloud,

Half-hidden drop of dew.

Most people have to hurry,

They do not stop to see...

I'm glad that God made Grandma,

Unrushed and young, like me.

~Author Unknown~

I should have known

Yesterday morning I got to work and I was struck by a love for my job. I loved everything about it, the kids, the passion, the other people I teach with! I even sent a text message to Pat telling him how fantastic my job is.

I should have known.

Less than twenty minutes later I was on the phone calling the office to have Mrs. Smithson send the janitor to our classroom to clean up projectile vomit (we're talking a 5 foot range people!). By the end of my day I had three seven-year-old girls in attention-seeking, drama-spewing apoplectic tears.

I should have known.

I got home and started dinner. And as I came out of the kitchen to inquire about some dinner thing or other I watched my husband stand on the hearth to squish a spider on the ceiling. I watched the spider (presumably dead) fall in his face and, as if in slow motion, I watched him fall, not catch himself, topple into a box fan, a TV table and then final land on his side in a groaning heap.

Within an hour, he was in urgent care with his dad (I had to put Wiggles to bed). Another half hour and the doctors at urgent care had called for an ambulance and another half hour after that he was strapped to a backboard with his head in a vice, headed to the hospital and my father-in-law had come and given me the car so I could head to the hospital to join him.

Pat spent nearly five hours strapped to that backboard. I have never had the pleasure to be strapped to a backboard, but as my husband will tell you, it is extremely uncomfortable. We're talking "bordering on panicking because I can't stand the pain", uncomfortable. He was strapped down from 8:30 PM until 1:30 AM before they could get him in for his scan, check the scan to make sure he was ok and final release him. 

I saw my bed at 2:00 AM. Wiggles, blissfully unaware of the evening events woke up at her usual 6:30 AM. At least she was smiling.

So there you go. Just another day in my life. Can I get a nap?

Brave Husband. Aren't his eyes pretty?

*Edit: It was drawn to my attention that I didn't actually finish the story. So, as to Pat's health, the doctor said it looked like he had been in a car crash on the CT scan. The kind where technically all you did was strain your neck, but really that means you'll be so sore you'll want to cry every time you put on your shoes for like the next week. But we are counting our blessings that he didn't inadvertently loosen his hardware or something.

Sleeping Break Through

The only place she slept well for about three months was in my arms. That was a long three months...

I'm not a baby sleep genius, in fact I often feel like this lady. Take a second to read it. 

Go ahead, I'll wait. 

Finished? Good, now you understand the last year of my life. Moving on. 

I had an epiphany today. I read this book (along with about 900 others, but this was the one that made the most sense to me) called Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child that talked about sleep as not the amount of time a child should be asleep or at what time, but rather the appropriate "hours of wakefulness." The idea (very simplified) is that tiny babies can only be awake for an hour to two hours at a time before their bodies need to sleep again. When babies are first born they are growing so quickly, they need a ton of sleep to rest their bodies and their brains. As babies get bigger they can remain awake and take in new stimuli for longer periods of time, thus resulting in a longer "period of wakefulness."

Here's the "well duh" part. I've been thinking about Wiggle's naps as how many, what time, and how long. What I should have been focusing on is the time in between naps. How long has she been awake and is she old enough to handle being awake for longer. 

She's ready for one nap? Instead of thinking about when the nap should be and how long, I should have been slowly increasing her "hours of wakefulness." Seems like I should have understood this from the beginning right? Well I have only two words as an excuse: Sleep Deprivation! Poor Wiggles. The first is always the guinea pig right? Baby number two will benefit from your hardships, just remember that when you are talking to your therapist someday!

Two days in and we already had a nice long nap 2 days in a row! In fact yesterday my child (yes, MY child!) slept for two hours straight. Thats right people, the longest nap my child has taken since she was literally three weeks old! Amen and Hallelujah! I could kiss someone!

To all the moms out there who are struggling with naplessness and/or nighttime sleeplessness, there is hope! It will get better. It might not be for a year (sorry, honesty sucks), but it will happen. Hopefully sooner for you than for me...

God bless and good sleep,
Jillian

The Simple Things

I had a post planned for these pictures about summer and childhood and how we need to cherish memories of our own childhood and help our children make their own memories etc. etc., but instead of a long wordy post, I'll just share these pictures and say simply: These are the moments in life that matter. Make them count for more than the bad stuff.

Bread Baking

Thanks to my sister-in-law who gave me a fantastic (and easy) recipe for bread, I have seriously considered making bread from scratch on a weekly (although realistically, more like twice-a-week...ly...) basis. The recipe is fast (a huge plus for the mother of a toddler), easy (a huge plus for those of us with a history of turning out hard, round lumps that make better doorstops than dinner food) and it tastes fantastic. Another plus is that you can make white bread or wheat bread. Same recipe, more healthy.

So in considering this I decided to do some actual math, because sometimes the "homemade" way is actually just harder and not all that much better for you or your pocket. Now, I'm not going to show you the math (for several reasons, not least of which is I'm not very good at math and I might be off by a cent... or two...), but the final tallies came out thusly:

White bread: .76¢
Wheat bread: $1.36

Wow! The bread we buy (and only on sale) is still twice that at $2.98. Plus each batch of this heavenly stuff makes two huge loaves! Ok, not that huge, we had two today and between my father-in-law, mother-in-law, brother-in-law, husband, child and, oh yeah, me there are about two slices left. No lie. That's it. 

And you know what else? I enjoy making it. I like baking and it smells amazing in my house all day long.

Lesson today: Make bread at home, not only is it fantastic, cheaper and not as daunting as it might seem, it makes you very popular with the in-laws!

Photo bombing brother-in-law. Told you. Popular with the in-laws!